oh to come to God with a request and have the faith of a child. As adults, something in us has died...our ability to fully trust. After seeing God work in so many ways, after seeing prayer after prayer answered and watching God perform miracles in answer to prayer, I still have some sort of inability to trust my God fully. Why is this? Why does a child not lack the faith but we do??
We have been asking God for a confirmation about an opportunity we have to go to Latvia in September and He gave it to us. Of course He did. We asked Him. But part of me thought I'd have to get that confirmation solely based on my "feelings." Ya know--I felt good about going so maybe God's saying yes. But no...God answers prayers--in crazy ways sometimes! For whatever reason, it still surprises me!
"Oh ye of little faith."
God, increase my faith! Increase my trust in You. Thank you that you answer our prayers and hear your children! Help me to remember moments like these when I'm in another "delay" and can't figure out what's going on.
I love you, Lord!
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Saturday, July 25, 2009
for God only
"My soul waits in silence for God only;
From Him is my salvation.
He only is my rock and my salvation,
My stronghold; I shall not be greatly shaken.
My soul, wait in silence for God only,
For my hope is from Him.
He only is my rock and my salvation,
My stronghold; I shall not be shaken.
On God my salvation and my glory rest;
The rock of my strength, my refuge is in God.
Trust in Him at all times, O people;
Pour out your heart before Him;
God is a refuge for us."
Psalm 62:1-2; 5-8
I have been waiting on God. But have I been waiting for God only? Have I made Him my only rock and have I trusted in Him alone?
I have been waiting on circumstances, on people, on advice...I have put my trust in those things and telling myself that I am relying on God to show me what is next. Yes, God does work through circumstances, people and the advice of godly brothers and sisters in Christ, but I have put my hope in those things when my hope should be in God.
I have poured out my heart to other people instead of God. There is nothing wrong with telling others your heart; nothing wrong with confiding in someone and receiving advice and their opinions. However, I have poured out my heart to others and not to the only One who can actually be my refuge. I have spent my energy elsewhere and forgotten to confide in my God and receive strength and wisdom from Him.
Lord, forgive me for where I have trusted in others instead of you. Help me to seek You alone for true wisdom. Help me to rest in your glory and your presence. I thank You, Lord, that you are persistent with me and that You are patient with me. I thank you that you are teaching me your ways and that you are leading me closer to You. My next step is to be closer to You than I am now. Each step should lead to You; always closer and closer to God only.
From Him is my salvation.
He only is my rock and my salvation,
My stronghold; I shall not be greatly shaken.
My soul, wait in silence for God only,
For my hope is from Him.
He only is my rock and my salvation,
My stronghold; I shall not be shaken.
On God my salvation and my glory rest;
The rock of my strength, my refuge is in God.
Trust in Him at all times, O people;
Pour out your heart before Him;
God is a refuge for us."
Psalm 62:1-2; 5-8
I have been waiting on God. But have I been waiting for God only? Have I made Him my only rock and have I trusted in Him alone?
I have been waiting on circumstances, on people, on advice...I have put my trust in those things and telling myself that I am relying on God to show me what is next. Yes, God does work through circumstances, people and the advice of godly brothers and sisters in Christ, but I have put my hope in those things when my hope should be in God.
I have poured out my heart to other people instead of God. There is nothing wrong with telling others your heart; nothing wrong with confiding in someone and receiving advice and their opinions. However, I have poured out my heart to others and not to the only One who can actually be my refuge. I have spent my energy elsewhere and forgotten to confide in my God and receive strength and wisdom from Him.
Lord, forgive me for where I have trusted in others instead of you. Help me to seek You alone for true wisdom. Help me to rest in your glory and your presence. I thank You, Lord, that you are persistent with me and that You are patient with me. I thank you that you are teaching me your ways and that you are leading me closer to You. My next step is to be closer to You than I am now. Each step should lead to You; always closer and closer to God only.
Mercies are new in the morning
For at least one week, God has had me to wake at (almost) first light. I am impressed upon to spend time in His Word and with Him in prayer. Instead, however, I justify my desire to sleep longer and miss out on the opportunity to start my day in uninteruppted QUIET time (rare in my house) with God. How do I know that it is God who wakes me? I am in no way a morning person. In my whole life, the only way I wake up before 8:00 AM is with an alarm or with my children waking me up. I have been waking up before 7:00 most mornings.
Last night, I made it a point to tell myself that I would not miss that quiet time today. God is faithful. I awoke at 7:00 and I won't lie--it was a struggle to get myself out of the bed. I seriously had to fight the temptation to just go back to sleep.
Here I am, though, ready to share what God is teaching me this morning.
"My heart is steadfast, O God, my heart is steadfast;
I will sing, yes, I will sing praises!
Awake, my glory!
Awake, harp and lyre!
I will awaken the dawn.
I will give thanks to You, O Lord, among the peoples;
I will sing praises to You among the nations.
For Your lovingkindness is great to the heavens
And Your truth to the clouds.
Be exalted above the heavens, O God;
Let Your glory be above all the earth."
Psalm 57:7-11
"But as for my, I shall sing of Your strenth;
Yes, I shall joyfully sing of Your lovingkindess in the morning,
For You have been my stronghold
And a refuge in the day of my distress.
O my strength, I will sing praises to You;
For God is my stronghold, the God who shows me lovingkindess."
Psalm 59:16-17
Does God want me to spend time with Him "in the morning?" Oh yes, He does! Today I will revel in the glory of God! I will praise and worship Him all day! He is the rock I stand on. He will not fail me. Today I will just joy in knowing that God is guiding my next step. Am I still waiting on God? Yes. Is it still frustrating to not know what that next step is? Of course. But I have made that my focus. I have complained to anyone who will listen how frustrated I am. Oh the opportunities I have missed to joyfully sing of God's lovingkindess, His provision, His truth, and His guiding hands to those who would listen.
Don't let yourself become so wrapped up in the problems and the uncertain or unknown that you forget to give God all the glory, honor and praise He deserves!
"Oh God, you are my God, And I will ever praise you. I will seek you in the morning, And I will learn to walk in Your ways, And step by step, You lead me. And I will follow You all of my days."
-Michael W. Smith song Step by Step,
Last night, I made it a point to tell myself that I would not miss that quiet time today. God is faithful. I awoke at 7:00 and I won't lie--it was a struggle to get myself out of the bed. I seriously had to fight the temptation to just go back to sleep.
Here I am, though, ready to share what God is teaching me this morning.
"My heart is steadfast, O God, my heart is steadfast;
I will sing, yes, I will sing praises!
Awake, my glory!
Awake, harp and lyre!
I will awaken the dawn.
I will give thanks to You, O Lord, among the peoples;
I will sing praises to You among the nations.
For Your lovingkindness is great to the heavens
And Your truth to the clouds.
Be exalted above the heavens, O God;
Let Your glory be above all the earth."
Psalm 57:7-11
"But as for my, I shall sing of Your strenth;
Yes, I shall joyfully sing of Your lovingkindess in the morning,
For You have been my stronghold
And a refuge in the day of my distress.
O my strength, I will sing praises to You;
For God is my stronghold, the God who shows me lovingkindess."
Psalm 59:16-17
Does God want me to spend time with Him "in the morning?" Oh yes, He does! Today I will revel in the glory of God! I will praise and worship Him all day! He is the rock I stand on. He will not fail me. Today I will just joy in knowing that God is guiding my next step. Am I still waiting on God? Yes. Is it still frustrating to not know what that next step is? Of course. But I have made that my focus. I have complained to anyone who will listen how frustrated I am. Oh the opportunities I have missed to joyfully sing of God's lovingkindess, His provision, His truth, and His guiding hands to those who would listen.
Don't let yourself become so wrapped up in the problems and the uncertain or unknown that you forget to give God all the glory, honor and praise He deserves!
"Oh God, you are my God, And I will ever praise you. I will seek you in the morning, And I will learn to walk in Your ways, And step by step, You lead me. And I will follow You all of my days."
-Michael W. Smith song Step by Step,
Friday, July 24, 2009
Journey with my Lord
So, last night I began my reading where I left off the night before: at Psalm 22. Honestly, I had planned on reading only a few of the chapters and then picking up the latest YWAM book I'm in the middle of. But for some reason, I was compelled to keep reading. I read through psalm after psalm--most of which had something to do with "waiting on the Lord" which is so a problem for me lately. I was wondering what exactly God was trying to teach me when reading all of these. When I got to psalm 40 I read:
"I waited patiently for the Lord;
And He inclined to me and heard my cry.
He brought me up out of the pit of destruction, out of the miry clay,
And He set my feet upon a rock making my footsteps firm.
He put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to our God;
Many will see and fear
And will trust in the Lord.
How blessed is the man who has made the Lord his trust,
And has not turned to the proud, nor to those who lapse into falsehood.
Many, O Lord my God, are the wonders which You have done,
And your thoughts toward us;
There is none to compare with You.
If I would declare and speak of them,
They would be too numerous to count.
Sacrifice and meal offering You have not desired;
My ears You have opened;
Burnt offering and sin offering You have not required.
Then I said, "Behold I come;
In the scroll of the book it is written of me.
I delight to do Your will, O my God;
Your Law is within my heart."
I have proclaimed glad tidings of righteousness in the great congregation;
Behold, I will not restrain my lips,
O Lord, You know.
I have not hidden Your righteousness within my heart;
I have spoken of Your faithfulness and Your salvation;
I have not concealed Your lovingkindness and Your truth from the great congregation.
You, O Lord, will not withhold Your compassion from me;
Your lovingkindness and Your truth will continually preserve me."
(Psalm 40:1-11)
What I realized through that is that I have been waiting on God to do SOMETHING, to show me my next step, to lead us somewhere and give us a purpose. I have been waiting on God to give me purpose. The only thing wrong with that is that I ALREADY know His purpose! He is a missionary God and I am to speak of His truth, His lovingkindness, His righteousness to all people, everywhere, no matter where I am. I am so concerned about the future and where God wants us to live and what exactly we'll do when we get there and how it will all work out that I am forgetting to just live for Him now. I am forgetting to just take JOY in the fact that the Lord is my God! He is my hope, my salvation, my everything! I am forgetting that while I waited on Him yesterday to tell me the next step for my future, TODAY is the future and I am missing it! Oh Lord, forgive me for waiting to delight in You. Forgive me for thinking I am serving you while I wait when I truly haven't been serving You daily. Help me to change my heart and my attitude towards waiting on you for our next stage of life. Thank you for Your Word which speaks volumes to me!!
The psalm I ended with last night as the need to continue reading subsided was the
41st one and it ends like this:
"Blessed be the Lord, the God of Israel,
From everlasting to everlasting.
Amen and Amen."
And then I was able to put my Bible down, turn out my light and rest. This journey I am on sometimes seems long and tedious, but oh to have the Lord in control makes it worth it all!
"I waited patiently for the Lord;
And He inclined to me and heard my cry.
He brought me up out of the pit of destruction, out of the miry clay,
And He set my feet upon a rock making my footsteps firm.
He put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to our God;
Many will see and fear
And will trust in the Lord.
How blessed is the man who has made the Lord his trust,
And has not turned to the proud, nor to those who lapse into falsehood.
Many, O Lord my God, are the wonders which You have done,
And your thoughts toward us;
There is none to compare with You.
If I would declare and speak of them,
They would be too numerous to count.
Sacrifice and meal offering You have not desired;
My ears You have opened;
Burnt offering and sin offering You have not required.
Then I said, "Behold I come;
In the scroll of the book it is written of me.
I delight to do Your will, O my God;
Your Law is within my heart."
I have proclaimed glad tidings of righteousness in the great congregation;
Behold, I will not restrain my lips,
O Lord, You know.
I have not hidden Your righteousness within my heart;
I have spoken of Your faithfulness and Your salvation;
I have not concealed Your lovingkindness and Your truth from the great congregation.
You, O Lord, will not withhold Your compassion from me;
Your lovingkindness and Your truth will continually preserve me."
(Psalm 40:1-11)
What I realized through that is that I have been waiting on God to do SOMETHING, to show me my next step, to lead us somewhere and give us a purpose. I have been waiting on God to give me purpose. The only thing wrong with that is that I ALREADY know His purpose! He is a missionary God and I am to speak of His truth, His lovingkindness, His righteousness to all people, everywhere, no matter where I am. I am so concerned about the future and where God wants us to live and what exactly we'll do when we get there and how it will all work out that I am forgetting to just live for Him now. I am forgetting to just take JOY in the fact that the Lord is my God! He is my hope, my salvation, my everything! I am forgetting that while I waited on Him yesterday to tell me the next step for my future, TODAY is the future and I am missing it! Oh Lord, forgive me for waiting to delight in You. Forgive me for thinking I am serving you while I wait when I truly haven't been serving You daily. Help me to change my heart and my attitude towards waiting on you for our next stage of life. Thank you for Your Word which speaks volumes to me!!
The psalm I ended with last night as the need to continue reading subsided was the
41st one and it ends like this:
"Blessed be the Lord, the God of Israel,
From everlasting to everlasting.
Amen and Amen."
And then I was able to put my Bible down, turn out my light and rest. This journey I am on sometimes seems long and tedious, but oh to have the Lord in control makes it worth it all!
Thursday, July 23, 2009
School
Okay, so I know I wrote that we were officially starting school a few weeks ago but...that didn't happen. :)
We started this week--on Tuesday. Our first day of school was spent at the zoo, enjoying the animals and having Eileen lead us around the zoo with a map. (One of her activites was to find her way on a map.) When we came home, she made cookies as part of her life skills. :)
Yesterday we had a gentle bookwork day with things and today was full swing ahead. (Sort of.) We went to the library to do school but the parking lot was so very crowded. It finally dawned on me that today was the Summer Reading Party and we were right on time! We went there instead and had a blast with a clown who did tricks, told a story and made balloon animals for everyone there. She was really very good. We went to a bait shop in Monroe and bought some worms for an experiment since we haven't found any in the yard in weeks. (No rain--although it is, of course, currently raining.)
Our experiment is one where we have different colored layers of soil and we put worms in there to discover what their niche (or job/role they have) is in the world. Craig wouldn't touch the worms so Merrick and I had to do it cause Eileen didn't want to either! So I am excited to be taking picture over the next few days to see how they will mix the soil.
The rest of our school day consisted of learning introduction things to world geography. We have a cute song to learn the continents as we point to them and all 3 of the kids are enjoying that. Eileen has labeled (with my help) a world map with a few different things and has really enjoyed "teaching" me and anyone else who'll listen about all the different things she learned. How fun!! Of course, our memory verse this week is John 3:16.
So, school has been successful today and FUN!! Finally, Eileen is enjoying herself in school. I pray it continues.
We started this week--on Tuesday. Our first day of school was spent at the zoo, enjoying the animals and having Eileen lead us around the zoo with a map. (One of her activites was to find her way on a map.) When we came home, she made cookies as part of her life skills. :)
Yesterday we had a gentle bookwork day with things and today was full swing ahead. (Sort of.) We went to the library to do school but the parking lot was so very crowded. It finally dawned on me that today was the Summer Reading Party and we were right on time! We went there instead and had a blast with a clown who did tricks, told a story and made balloon animals for everyone there. She was really very good. We went to a bait shop in Monroe and bought some worms for an experiment since we haven't found any in the yard in weeks. (No rain--although it is, of course, currently raining.)
Our experiment is one where we have different colored layers of soil and we put worms in there to discover what their niche (or job/role they have) is in the world. Craig wouldn't touch the worms so Merrick and I had to do it cause Eileen didn't want to either! So I am excited to be taking picture over the next few days to see how they will mix the soil.
The rest of our school day consisted of learning introduction things to world geography. We have a cute song to learn the continents as we point to them and all 3 of the kids are enjoying that. Eileen has labeled (with my help) a world map with a few different things and has really enjoyed "teaching" me and anyone else who'll listen about all the different things she learned. How fun!! Of course, our memory verse this week is John 3:16.
So, school has been successful today and FUN!! Finally, Eileen is enjoying herself in school. I pray it continues.
Thursday, July 16, 2009
RTN Adventures
Today was Reach the Nations Day 7...I think. :) 3 young men asked Jesus to be their Saviour today. How awesome!!! I am so excited about this. Especially because tomorrow there will be a group invitation given to everyone and the gospel even more clearly stated to these kids.
I am praying for one Muslim boy in particular. While I doubt he would come forward in front of his brother and his friend, I am hoping that the Holy Spirit is tugging at his heart. I have been in a different group of kids this week so I haven't been able to see his reaction during devotion time but I am praying and hoping there is change taking place!
On a more heart-breaking note, I was ministering to a 6-year-old girl today who told me, "Everybody knows I'm gonna go to hell anyways." I think my heart broke right there when I heard those words. I wrapped my arms around her and told her that Jesus loves her so much and wants her to live forever in heaven with him and all she has to do is ask Him into her heart. She was talking about bad choices and I told her that Jesus will forgive her for her bad choices. She said, "But he knows I'll just do 'em again." Smile. "Yes, honey, He does know that. And you know what? He forgives you anyway again and again. He loves you that much."
Where does a 6 year old get the idea that she's going to hell??? Only because someone's told her that. It just infuriates me when I think about that. Who would tell a child that? Who would leave a child with THAT kind of fear and not tell them how they can escape going to hell?!
She didn't want to come back tomorrow but said she would if I would stay with her. :) So I agreed. How sweet!! I hope in the day I have left that the Lord will give me the words to speak to make a difference in her heart.
Thank you, Lord for this opportunity to participate in Reach the Nations. Thank you for not letting me pass this up!!
I am praying for one Muslim boy in particular. While I doubt he would come forward in front of his brother and his friend, I am hoping that the Holy Spirit is tugging at his heart. I have been in a different group of kids this week so I haven't been able to see his reaction during devotion time but I am praying and hoping there is change taking place!
On a more heart-breaking note, I was ministering to a 6-year-old girl today who told me, "Everybody knows I'm gonna go to hell anyways." I think my heart broke right there when I heard those words. I wrapped my arms around her and told her that Jesus loves her so much and wants her to live forever in heaven with him and all she has to do is ask Him into her heart. She was talking about bad choices and I told her that Jesus will forgive her for her bad choices. She said, "But he knows I'll just do 'em again." Smile. "Yes, honey, He does know that. And you know what? He forgives you anyway again and again. He loves you that much."
Where does a 6 year old get the idea that she's going to hell??? Only because someone's told her that. It just infuriates me when I think about that. Who would tell a child that? Who would leave a child with THAT kind of fear and not tell them how they can escape going to hell?!
She didn't want to come back tomorrow but said she would if I would stay with her. :) So I agreed. How sweet!! I hope in the day I have left that the Lord will give me the words to speak to make a difference in her heart.
Thank you, Lord for this opportunity to participate in Reach the Nations. Thank you for not letting me pass this up!!
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Morning Psalms
This morning as I was going through some psalms searching for verses about God's guidance, here is what I found:
"To You, O Lord, I lift up my soul. O my God, in You I trust, do not let me be ashamed; do not let my enemies exult over me. Indeed, none of those who wait for You will be ashamed; those who deal treacherously without cause will be ashamed. MAKE ME KNOW YOUR WAYS, O LORD; TEACH ME YOUR PATHS. LEAD ME IN YOUR TRUTH AND TEACH ME, FOR YOU ARE THE GOD OF MY SALVATION; FOR YOU I WAIT ALL THE DAY."
Psalm 25:1-5
"The earth is the Lord's and all it contains, the world, and those who dwell in it. For He has founded it upon the seas and established it upon the rivers. Who may ascend into the hill of the Lord? And who may stand in His holy place? He who has clean hands and a pure heart, who has not lifted up his soul to falsehood and has not sworn deceitfully. He shall receive a blessing from the Lord and righteousness from the God of his salvation. This is the generation of those who seek Him, who seek Your face--even Jacob. Lift up your heads, O gates, and be lifted up, O ancient doors, that the King of glory may come in! Who is the King of glory? The Lord strong and mighty, the Lord mighty in battle. Lift up your head, O gates, and lift them up, O ancient doors, that the King of glory may come in! Who is this King of glory? The Lord of hosts, He is the King of glory."
Psalm 24
"Wait for the Lord; be strong and let your heart take courage; Yes, wait for the Lord."
Psalm 27:14
"To You, O Lord, I call; My rock, do not be deaf to me, for if You are silent to me, I will become like those who go down to the pit. Hear the voice of my supplications when I cry to You for help, when I lift up my hands toward Your holy sanctuary...." "Blessed be the Lord, because He has heard the voice of my supplication. The Lord is my strength and my shield; My heart trusts in Him, and I am helped; therefore my heart exults, and with my song I shall thank Him. The Lord is their strenth, and He is a saving defense to His anointed. Save Your people and bless Your inheritance; Be their shepherd also and carry them forever."
Psalm 28:1-2; 6-9
Isn't it wonderful how a little time with God demolishes the pity party inside my head? :)
Thank you, Lord Jesus, for guiding my steps even when I can't see where You're leading me. Thank you for picking me up and putting me back where I belong when I stray. O Lord O Lord how majestic is Your Name in all the earth!
Amen!!!
"To You, O Lord, I lift up my soul. O my God, in You I trust, do not let me be ashamed; do not let my enemies exult over me. Indeed, none of those who wait for You will be ashamed; those who deal treacherously without cause will be ashamed. MAKE ME KNOW YOUR WAYS, O LORD; TEACH ME YOUR PATHS. LEAD ME IN YOUR TRUTH AND TEACH ME, FOR YOU ARE THE GOD OF MY SALVATION; FOR YOU I WAIT ALL THE DAY."
Psalm 25:1-5
"The earth is the Lord's and all it contains, the world, and those who dwell in it. For He has founded it upon the seas and established it upon the rivers. Who may ascend into the hill of the Lord? And who may stand in His holy place? He who has clean hands and a pure heart, who has not lifted up his soul to falsehood and has not sworn deceitfully. He shall receive a blessing from the Lord and righteousness from the God of his salvation. This is the generation of those who seek Him, who seek Your face--even Jacob. Lift up your heads, O gates, and be lifted up, O ancient doors, that the King of glory may come in! Who is the King of glory? The Lord strong and mighty, the Lord mighty in battle. Lift up your head, O gates, and lift them up, O ancient doors, that the King of glory may come in! Who is this King of glory? The Lord of hosts, He is the King of glory."
Psalm 24
"Wait for the Lord; be strong and let your heart take courage; Yes, wait for the Lord."
Psalm 27:14
"To You, O Lord, I call; My rock, do not be deaf to me, for if You are silent to me, I will become like those who go down to the pit. Hear the voice of my supplications when I cry to You for help, when I lift up my hands toward Your holy sanctuary...." "Blessed be the Lord, because He has heard the voice of my supplication. The Lord is my strength and my shield; My heart trusts in Him, and I am helped; therefore my heart exults, and with my song I shall thank Him. The Lord is their strenth, and He is a saving defense to His anointed. Save Your people and bless Your inheritance; Be their shepherd also and carry them forever."
Psalm 28:1-2; 6-9
Isn't it wonderful how a little time with God demolishes the pity party inside my head? :)
Thank you, Lord Jesus, for guiding my steps even when I can't see where You're leading me. Thank you for picking me up and putting me back where I belong when I stray. O Lord O Lord how majestic is Your Name in all the earth!
Amen!!!
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Wanna be Facebook Post
"My God, my God, why have You forsaken me? Far from my deliverance are the words of my groaning. O my God, I cry by day, but You do not answer; And by night but I have no rest. Yet You are holy, O You who are enthroned upon the praises of Israel. In Your our fathers trusted; They trusted and You delivered them. To You they cried out and were delivered; In You they trusted and were not disappointed."
Psalm 22:1-5
Since apparently negative-type comments about my attitude are supposed to be kept from facebook, I guess I'll have to share my feelings here instead. :)
I feel let down but I know that God will answer in His own good time. I know He has better things out there for us. I think I have briefly fallen into coveting another lifestyle or something. Oh God please help me to move on past this and to GET OVER IT!!
Psalm 22:1-5
Since apparently negative-type comments about my attitude are supposed to be kept from facebook, I guess I'll have to share my feelings here instead. :)
I feel let down but I know that God will answer in His own good time. I know He has better things out there for us. I think I have briefly fallen into coveting another lifestyle or something. Oh God please help me to move on past this and to GET OVER IT!!
what is wrong with me?
Found out today (after falling in love with a house we went to look at in Acworth) that Craig isn't going to get the children's/youth pastor position he applied for. I was sooooooooo hoping he was going to get it. I really thought that was how God would prepare us for one day going on the mission field. But apparently not. Now I am sad. Can't seem to shake it off. Craig said he never really felt one way or another about it so he's okay. But me? Not okay. What's wrong with me? Why can't I just roll with the punches? What is God doing here? Why does it seem like when I get one or two questions answered, a thousand more follow in their places? What are we supposed to do? Why won't anyone hire him? How come when some people seek God they get an answer immediately...or in a few weeks/months??? But us---nope. I am having a hard day praising Him in the storm today. I wish I was one of those people who could always see the good in the bad. Usually I am. Not today. I am having a nice little pity party over here and I'm apparently ALL alone in that party.
I hate that we drove all over Acworth today. I hate that we looked inside that house. I hate that we have it all on video. I hate that I apparently have no clue where our lives are headed. And I hate that I feel like hating everything right now. I want to be happy, upbeat, excited about what God will offer in the future. You know...when God closes a door He opens a window and all that. Only trouble with that is now I'm thinking about that house with all the doors and windows!!
Please don't take this the wrong way. I do trust God. I do trust He will bring something better. I do know He will take care of us and provide for us. I've watched miracles take place in the last 9 months. I am just tired of not knowing where we will be in a month. And I am just human.
(Hopefully I will have something better to report next time...or at least be in a better mood.) :)
I hate that we drove all over Acworth today. I hate that we looked inside that house. I hate that we have it all on video. I hate that I apparently have no clue where our lives are headed. And I hate that I feel like hating everything right now. I want to be happy, upbeat, excited about what God will offer in the future. You know...when God closes a door He opens a window and all that. Only trouble with that is now I'm thinking about that house with all the doors and windows!!
Please don't take this the wrong way. I do trust God. I do trust He will bring something better. I do know He will take care of us and provide for us. I've watched miracles take place in the last 9 months. I am just tired of not knowing where we will be in a month. And I am just human.
(Hopefully I will have something better to report next time...or at least be in a better mood.) :)
Friday, July 10, 2009
This week
We had an awesome time this week serving in Stone Mountain amongst kids from the city as well as kids recently relocated here from Iraq, Tanzania, Nepal, Bhutan and I'm sure there were others. We only saw a little bit of it because some groups went into different apartments complexes to do backyard bible clubs as well. But what we were able to participate in has been an awesome experience. I almost passed up this opportunity. I almost said no when asked if I could help...why? Because it involved sports which is out of my comfort zone. Oh my goodness...thank you Lord for convicting me right out of that comfort zone. This week has grown me in ways I didn't think it would. I thought I went there to impact children's lives for Christ...and I hope that happened. However, my life was impacted as well. These children touched me. I now have such a desire to reach people who have never heard about a relationship with Jesus.
I have a special place in my heart for the kids I met this week. There was one child in particular...I didn't show favoritism in any way towards him but I will pray hardest for him. He is Muslim and I'm honestly not sure why he was allowed to come back after the first day finding out this was a Christian event. He didn't actively participate in Tuesday's devotion but he did sit there and listen respectfully. Wednesday I worried about him because he didn't come back. However he was back on Thursday and Friday but he had a friend with him. This friend tried to distract him during the devotion by walking away or quietly talking over me to him. I tried to get him involved, especially today since we talked about Abraham and we share that background of our faiths. I think, if it weren't for his friend being there, he would've listened intently to everything we had to say this week. I pray he comes back next week. I pray his friend does as well. But I pray they are in separate groups so that at the very least, one can hear the loving message of Jesus Christ preached.
I have smiled a ton this week. This is where God wants us for now. :) Until we know where to go next, "I will serve you while I'm waiting, I will worship while I'm waiting on you Lord!!"
Here is a video of what we did this week:
I have a special place in my heart for the kids I met this week. There was one child in particular...I didn't show favoritism in any way towards him but I will pray hardest for him. He is Muslim and I'm honestly not sure why he was allowed to come back after the first day finding out this was a Christian event. He didn't actively participate in Tuesday's devotion but he did sit there and listen respectfully. Wednesday I worried about him because he didn't come back. However he was back on Thursday and Friday but he had a friend with him. This friend tried to distract him during the devotion by walking away or quietly talking over me to him. I tried to get him involved, especially today since we talked about Abraham and we share that background of our faiths. I think, if it weren't for his friend being there, he would've listened intently to everything we had to say this week. I pray he comes back next week. I pray his friend does as well. But I pray they are in separate groups so that at the very least, one can hear the loving message of Jesus Christ preached.
I have smiled a ton this week. This is where God wants us for now. :) Until we know where to go next, "I will serve you while I'm waiting, I will worship while I'm waiting on you Lord!!"
Here is a video of what we did this week:
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
So, what next?
"Be anxious for nothing but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your heart and your mind in Christ Jesus."
Philippians 4:6-7
Easier "read" than done in my case. :) But one thing I know for sure, God's peace definitely surpasses my understanding!
With Craig in Romania, each of us has been thinking about our future in missions. He is growing and praying and being mentored over there. I am growing and praying over here. (Dont' so much have the mentor part...)
Should we be overseas missionaries? Latvia, Romania, some other place? Should we be missionaries where we are and take a few trips each year to these other places? What should our missionary lives look like? We have been called to international missions, but as I am learning there are TONS of opportunities for that right here in our area. How can we overlook these people who need Jesus, too? But on the flip side, how can we overlook those still in other countries who need Jesus and lots of physical help?
I am being presented with many opportunities for international missions over the next few months. I will be praying over which ones to do. I know I can't do them all because of finances and life in general, but I would like to do many of them.
How do we know what to do? What would best suit our family? More importantly, which option does God want us to choose? Why does it seem like all I ever do is to ask questions?
I do know one thing for sure, though--God has given all of us a heart for His people ALL over the world and a desire to know them, help them, love them. I pray that we will fulfill our part of going into all nations and making disciples for Jesus Christ!!
I can't wait til Craig gets back and we can have a real heart to heart about his experiences during this trip to Romania. Hopefully we'll plan a family mission trip to Romania in the semi-near future as well!
Philippians 4:6-7
Easier "read" than done in my case. :) But one thing I know for sure, God's peace definitely surpasses my understanding!
With Craig in Romania, each of us has been thinking about our future in missions. He is growing and praying and being mentored over there. I am growing and praying over here. (Dont' so much have the mentor part...)
Should we be overseas missionaries? Latvia, Romania, some other place? Should we be missionaries where we are and take a few trips each year to these other places? What should our missionary lives look like? We have been called to international missions, but as I am learning there are TONS of opportunities for that right here in our area. How can we overlook these people who need Jesus, too? But on the flip side, how can we overlook those still in other countries who need Jesus and lots of physical help?
I am being presented with many opportunities for international missions over the next few months. I will be praying over which ones to do. I know I can't do them all because of finances and life in general, but I would like to do many of them.
How do we know what to do? What would best suit our family? More importantly, which option does God want us to choose? Why does it seem like all I ever do is to ask questions?
I do know one thing for sure, though--God has given all of us a heart for His people ALL over the world and a desire to know them, help them, love them. I pray that we will fulfill our part of going into all nations and making disciples for Jesus Christ!!
I can't wait til Craig gets back and we can have a real heart to heart about his experiences during this trip to Romania. Hopefully we'll plan a family mission trip to Romania in the semi-near future as well!
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